Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Queen Meme Tuesday

People are always giving advice on what NOT to do in this situation and that situation. I’ve had it with the know-it-alls this week. I’m switching it up.
It’s your turn to be the expert. Answer what NOT to do in the following situations.
It’s your spin on potential societal blunders (and a few quirky scenarios you might find yourself in). You didn't think I'd leave my quirk home now did ya?
Have at it.

What NOT To Do when you’re…..

1. On a first date Bring the 1ow40 and your tawse, especially after you've asked your Date to take you to a place with a strip pole

2. Intoxicated DRIVE

3. In the shower make toast

4. At your ex’s wedding Object

5. In jail Drop your soap

6. being stalked let your guard down

7. Stuck to an igloo Start a fire

8. In sewing class Stab your seat mate with pinking shears

9. Asleep in a helium balloon Fart

10. At a birthday party for twins Blow out their candles

11. On a nude beach use your magnifying glass (or maybe you should. Hmmm)

12. At the opera Snore

13. you’re falling in love Reference your ex too much

14. Low on gasoline in a bad part of town Unlock your doors

15. Having a baby start questioning the paternity of the almost present child

16. On fire Grab an oxygen tank

17. Lost at the mall ask the kid at the Orange Julius stand for directions

18. At a single’s dance Show off your engagement ring

19. Riding a bike on the Jersey Turnpike look for Tony Soprano

20. Driving your significant other's car Explode the Engine

21. Being robbed at gunpoint Backtalk the man with the gun

22. Kissing Burp

23. Paying the hotel cashier Reference the (now empty) mini bar

24. Buying lingerie ask someone else to try it on for you

24. Commenting on a blog Insult the writer

25. In Queen Mimi's dungeon Uh, give Homer baklava?... oh, wait... um...

for more fun, go here


Jean-Luc Picard said...

Some of those are really side-splitting! The helium balloon...!

Durward Discussion said...

The secret to the dungeon is bribing the dog? Letting that cat (dog) out of the bag could get you in trouble.

Melissa Lynn Shell said...

hahaha to the sewing class question

j said...

"ask the kid at the Orange Julius stand for directions"... all roads will lead to the GAP if you do!

Great answers all!

Anonymous said...

#1 is...ummm...different...and without question stellar advice. :>)

Mimi Lenox said...

It was you!!! I knew it. You are the ringleader of this conspiracy, aren't you? know how I know?

Homer talks in his sleep.