First Loves

Do we ever get over our first loves?

There are those that say we don't. That when we fall in love the first time, there is not any 'scar tissue', no emotional baggage. You are wide open to the sensation and will give yourself freely to the person that you love. And, that is something you can never truly get over. Some are lucky enough to marry their first loves, and the marriage works, which I think is great. Some of us, however, are not that lucky.

While I do see their point,these people who think you'll never get over the first love, I can also see the reverse. When you love someone, it takes a whole lot of damage to fall out of love, doesn't it? It does for me. While I do not HATE HATE HATE my ex-husband, who was really my first love, I could never be in love with him again. Even if he turned into the perfect man and redeemed all the pain. I just couldn't. (Not that it will ever happen. He's in Rhode Island, where he belongs.). I would never WANT it to happen.

So, am I over it? Yeah. I really am.
Do I have baggage now? Well. Yeah. But baggage is what we learn on. It's how we figure out what we really want. It's how we figure out what annoying things we can tolerate in someone we care about, and what we cannot tolerate. It's a part of growing up.
While the first love is sweet, and exiting, and unknown, I find love much more fun when you do know what is happening, you know what that exited feeling is, and you fully embrace it, and enjoy it, knowingly. Because you CHOOSE to. And I think, even though it may not be your first love, its your LAST love that really counts.